Shooting Stars Dream

Wow….. i’m willing to say that maybe I scanned a website and subliminally picked up a headline about the meteor shower…… I just don’t recall. In last night’s dream, I distinctly remember being outside and seeing shooting stars everywhere….. I was getting mad that no one else could see them, they were everywhere. So this morning I saw an article about a meteor shower taking place tonight. I love meteor showers!

I do stuff

Basically, here’s the gist of it. I have decided that since I don’t have the money to go on an awesome backpacking trip in the Alps or any of the other bullets on my bucket list….. i’ve decided to go ahead and do what I can with what I have, where I am. That’s why I go out like this. That’s why i’m always going off to parks and what not. I know people have got to be like, “Dang son! Do you ever stay home?!” LOL. I do. But here’s what I remember. I remember a time in my life where days would literally just pass me by. I’d think of how I wanted to get up and get out….. but i’d find a reason not to…. so i’d just lounge around the house and dream of actually living. I reluctantly got out. It was more of a chore than actual excitement. I would always think of the process involved rather than the fun awaiting me… i’d think about how I had to actually get dressed and do something to myself, prepare kids and load them and run into potential disasters and i’d basically just be like “too much process”. That was my motto. Now? I don’t give a shit about process lol. Bring it on. I’m only getting older. Life can only be lived once. If I never have that amazing adventurous life of traveling the world, i’m still going to make it as amazing as it can get. I thoroughly enjoy being outdoors and seeing places for the first time. It’s so exciting. Doesn’t take much to entertain me, i’m like an overgrown 5 year old. It’s just, people are always saying, “You guys go allover the place!” and I they say it like “how do you do it?”…… and it’s because….. it’s important to me. You’ll find time for whatever is important to you and so I make time for this. I want my kids to grow up with the same sense of adventure I felt as a child (and still feel lol). I don’t want them to be one of those people that comes home from work and just lays around as the days pass them by. What are you working for if you’re not living? Work to support actual LIVING. And don’t wait for things to be perfect, they’ll never be perfect. Don’t wait for things to be easy, either. Just do it anyways. That’s how I feel. If shit goes south, at least I tried. At least I can say, “Well, I won’t do it like THAT again” rather than always wondering. I just want to live. If I drive an hour away and my kids all simultaneously poop their pants and scream nonstop or whatever other disaster may happen, I can just deal with it and tell myself, “There’s always tomorrow.” I will survive lol. So just live. Just get out, even if you’re tired, even if the couch and the tv are calling your name. Ignore it and get out in the world.

So there’s my little tidbit or whatevs lol.

Here’s just a collection of pics of what has taken place over the past several days lol. The majority of the pictures are from Ravine Gardens State Park. I’m telling you, pics don’t really do it justice. I’ve started to learn my lesson. You’ll see a place get good reviews but you look at the pics and you’re like, “Big deal?”….. but pictures never really portray what things actually look like in real time. This place was wonderful. It was part of the New Deal era and so it just has that 30’s vibe to it…. I SO love being places that seem like they’ve got some history to them because I just imagine that i’m walking in the footsteps of people from back in the day….. idk, it’s just always been a thing of mine…. like women in big frilly dresses or men with top hats….. blissfully ignorant folk lol. I love the way they gardened back in the day. Like, that was one of their things….. and so the past seems like it would smell like Lavender and Jasmine and stuff….. because that’s just what they did lol. I’m rambling. It was very “woodsy”. My eyes start twitching when I hear people say they aren’t very big on the outdoors lol…… and start talking smack about bugs and whatever…. it’s like….. are you alien? LOL. No, seriously dude, what planet are you from. It’s wake up and smell the ROSES, not wake up and smell the Mediterranean Lavender Airwick (Though that is among my favorite air fresheners….. I have a crop because I like smelling stuff lol)….. Being in the woods is exciting because it’s not a “what you see is what you get” thing…. you have NO idea what’s out there….. anything could be hiding behind a tree…. lurking around in bushes….. okay, I could see how that would creep some people out…. it’s a rush for me. It’s exciting. I like not knowing. It drives me cray and makes me uneasy but I guess I like that helpless feeling? It makes my heart sort of race with uncertainty and that always let’s you know you’re still alive =) Everything smelled like the woods and….. azaleas? I believe that’s what I was smelling…. though the flowers were not in bloom but the bushes were everywhere. We had azalea bushes at our house in Virginia so I am pretty sure the smell is familiar. I know I smelled moss…. it’s distinct…. AHHHHHH! I just want to go roll in the dirt and leaves and rub moss on my face (kidding not kidding).

Calm down, I’m done rambling. I took my crew on the lamest picnic of the century lol. We were supposed to go to a new park but when we got there we realized that it was loaded with trails and my mom can’t get down like that. So we went to a random location that i’ve been to before and it’s like “meh”….. left there and went to a park we always go to around my way. I’m gonna shut up now because if I don’t, i’ll never post this. Focker out.

 

Oh, oh, oh. And here were the prominent songs of the trip:

 

 

(My uncles went to school with her^^^^ =)

 

 

 

 

And the rest are from the failed picnic gig and my nephew’s birthday party:

 

Church dream

Weird dream that we went to a church event….. Some sort of show they were putting on. Of course, we were the last ones there lol. It was totally packed so we had to sit in the balcony. The church looked way different, too. Anyways a girl was singing but it was hard to hear her because her mic wasn’t turned up loud enough. There was an intermission for the restroom and coffee. Naturally, I was in coffee line. That’s pretty much the gist of it. I was there lol.

Annoyed

Omg, I am a horrible person lol. Do you ever get in the mood to just be mean to people? I’m telling you, there must be something wrong with me because I am SUPER nice lol….. but sometimes I get in one of those moods where literally everyone annoys me. I was browsing Pinterest and I just kept getting irritated by all of these Pinterest folk. First, I would never want to be subjected to a roast because someone could definitely roast my ass lol. So i’m not calling anyone out like i’m not a weirdo that literally just sprayed my hair with blue for coloring and vinegar, mkay? I’m obnoxious, i’m specifically random and sometimes my hair smells like scalp. But there are times that I get in a weird mood and I have this look all day:

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Hair salons are the worst. Why do they all talk like that? “Omg, i’m so excited. I can’t wait to see what it’s going to look like. Super excited. Excited. I’m like soooooooooo excited. This is so exciting. What an exciting do.” And like….. they CONSTANTLY say “excited” to the point I think that must be some sort of neurolinguistic programing tactic they picked up in hair school for the illuminati. Like, they saaaaaaayyyyyy excited…… but they sound and look like bitchy resting face.

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If you say anything that they disagree with, they shoot you an awkward 5 second pause, “Oh no, I totally get it. Yeah. Fer suuurrreeee. No problem, we can fix that….. it’s just….. most people don’t really ask for that hair color sooooo…. but YEAH. Totally. I love it. I’m so excited.”

Why do so many women sound the same? Why do they drag their syllables out so awkwardly long? I’m getting mad lol. Can any of us just speak naturally anymore?

Anyways. So here is an organic spread from Pinterest:

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Organic. Detox. Homemade cheez-its? I’m sorry. Homemade cheez-its? Look at that lady pouring up the sizzurp…. She looks like suuuuuper excited to be drinking her dinner. I bet her husband hides from her in the shed and pretends to be doing important stuff lol. See? I’m in such a mean mood right now. She looks effing cray cray. Idk if you peeped out that organic chocolate zucchini bread or not but I want to be very clear that it is paleo, gluten free, and grain free. Remember: the people who eat this stuff play farmville and criminal case on like an hourly basis….. I’m so annoyed right now lol.

I saw this bracelet, as well:

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How adorbs. This 14 year old blond haired, blue eyed child of suburbia is a gypsy lol:

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Oh, but I know. It means they have a “free spirit”….. so free that they religiously tan, get their teeth professionally whitened, hair bleached, and spend hundreds of dollars on clothes that looked like they came from the thrift store lol.

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I just had to keep the caption lol. What exactly are we escaping from? The actual Native American that you stole that headdress from? LOL. I really want to know what possesses a young white female to decide that she wants to buy an Indian chief headdress? How does she arrive at that decision? “Mom, Dad, i’m going to the flea market, be back later!”……. “Hey, lets go out to the field and take some instagram pics with our new headgear.” lol. I can’t. I wonder what’s on her shirt lol. Probably a band she’s never heard of. I’m a terrible person.

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Why would you do this to yourself. I don’t care about the “ironic fox sweater”…. i’m talking about those shorts, son! It looks like she pooped in them like SO many times. There is absolutely nothing flattering about shorts like that. I genuinely do not understand them. It really looks like she found a pair of her dad’s old pants from middle school and cut them into shorts. It looks like she is wearing a diaper underneath them. I can only imagine what they look like in the back. And the rouge just completes the, “I have no idea how I ended up here” look she’s going for. “No, seriously. Where am I?”……..

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He looks like he doesn’t shut up. He just has that look in his eyes, that look of, “If you acknowledge me by so much as a brief glance, i’m going to literally read you a chapter out of the book i’m currently reading……” followed by an elaborate story about the origin of his tattoo and how you wouldn’t understand.

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But for real, though. ^^^^That is the official look of Pinterest. This is the absolute go-to outfit if you’re trying to throw something together real quick and stumble upon a “casual outfit for errands” pin. And then you go to her blog and imagine how often she literally harasses her husband to take pictures for her because “This is important to me! God! You literally NEVER support anything I do!”…… and she wore this outfit over to her mom’s house while she left the kids with her dude lol. In fact, her brother (who still lives with mom) took this picture. I disgust myself. But for real, this outfit is spammed across Pinterest like so hardcore (not *this* one but variations of the same concept) that I honestly considered making it my Halloween costume.

Cognac. Remember when this used to be cognac?

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Not anymore, my friends! Welcome to the new cognac:

 

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I get irritated lol. My husband is at Walgreens buying me some cocoa covered peanuts. Do you know how much that annoys me? I’m going to lay in bed and make fun of people on pinterest while eating an unhealthy amount of cocoa peanuts. I’m going to crunch them really loud as my husband plays Skyrim. We are so obnoxious! I have to get out of the house tomorrow. I can’t deal lol. I need to go for a bike ride or something…..

 

God doesn’t change

Many things come to mind when I think about God…. like, when I really dwell on Him and just put thought into who He is and His power and glory. One of the dominant thoughts is that God does not change. God is constant. He doesn’t have to change because God is all, God is everything, God is perfection and so there is no room for improvement with God. He is the Alpha and Omega….. He never has to change. God is as relevant today as he was at creation and before and will be as relevant in the end and beyond. Edit 10/19- I re-read that so many times and it really irritated me so I have to clarify lol. That sounds like we are before God and he is just “relevant” in our lives….. There is nothing without God…..of course He is relevant lol. 

Just thinking about that puts a whole new spin on life, really….

Here we are, day in and day out, worrying about things….. did we make the best decision on where to send our daughter to school? Is this home the best financial investment? Can we realistically afford another car payment? Someone has the flu. Funds weren’t deposited and a check bounced. A bill was late. The neighbor is making noise again. We’ll have to postpone our vacation, something came up. Someone started a grease fire in the kitchen lol. What am I going to wear to this meeting? What if these people don’t like me? Are they gossiping about me? Did you see the way he looked at me? I think I just got ripped off. Someone messed my order up in the drive thru. And the list just never ends because it’s always something, right? Always.

We pray for help in our time of need and rightfully so…. God does help us and God does hear our prayers…… but maybe all of these things are answers to our prayers. Or, maybe these are messages from God and we’re not listening, we’re not paying attention. Many of us have a habit of making life about us. I can get in this mode of thinking really quickly if i’m not careful……

I like to spend as much time in nature as humanly possible. I like observing the world. This world is set up on a system in which one thing is dependent upon another thing. Nothing works on it’s own. It depends on something else for survival. For instance, if you kill off a species, that species is DEFINITELY not the only thing that will be affected. The entire system would be affected.

But here we are assuming life is about us….. or more specifically, our lives are about us. They’re not. When I start to run down the mental list of all of my problems, I start to feel ridiculous because for one, they seem so trivial in the grand scheme of things lol. For real. Things made history. Legitimate things, battles, inventions, scandals, victories….. things made it into the history books…. who in the hell am I? LOL! In comparison to all of this before me….. does it really REALLY matter if I have nothing cute to wear tomorrow? Does it? This person clearly dislikes me. Throw us in the middle east right now and our differences will not even exist anymore. Line us up with 7 billion other people and let’s figure out whose problems are bigger. I seriously doubt it’s ours.

We blow our problems WAY out of proportion and sometimes it seems that this sort of undermines God’s power and glory….. as if He needs ANY of this to carry out His will. He doesn’t. Clearly, he doesn’t. Noah didn’t have a Yacht. Dude built an ark. He wasn’t stressing about riding the flood in style. These modern commodities are so insignificant and yet we let them define us and determine our fate. You could lose everything you have right now and God’s will in your life will still prevail. Do you understand that? God doesn’t change like we do. God doesn’t need any of this stuff and so we shouldn’t either. Our needs will be met. I know there are people in this world who live with way less than what I have…… and if I TRULY believe I am NO better than them, and I do, I really believe that, then I will be eternally grateful for whatever I have right now because I KNOW I don’t deserve it more than they do. I am not some spectacular person that deserves running water and a cozy bed….. and so when I complain about not having more, it makes me feel horrible because I know i’m very blessed for having the things I have…… We want things but we don’t need them. I want things but I don’t need them. In fact, I try to mentally prepare myself for being homeless because you never know what cards you will be dealt…… you never know where God will lead you and use you….. and I want to know that my faith isn’t going to be shaken by these changing circumstances. This stuff changes, God doesn’t. God’s will doesn’t change. He doesn’t need any of this. He can use it, but definitely doesn’t need it. Honestly, it’s nice to have these big churches and all of the fun programs that go with them…. but we’re kidding ourselves if we believe they are necessary. I’m going to praise God in the middle of an empty field. I can make music in the woods with no amp, trust me. It’s nice….. and I am grateful….. but we don’t need it.

God uses us in different ways. Some people were meant to be rich and influential….. that doesn’t mean YOU were….. and you should be okay with that. Some of us were meant to stay humble at the very bottom….. FOREVER. For the rest of our lives, we’re meant to be down here….. and all praise to God because His plan is perfect. Don’t worry about these changing circumstances, these changing trends, the changing technology…. root yourself into our unchanging God and trust His will for your life……no matter where it leads. Be joyful in all circumstances. See yourself in the BIGGER picture, where your problems disappear when held up against all of humanity….. That’s the beauty of God….. our problems are so minor in this great big universe, there are so many things out there that just make our struggles seem so little….. and yet, in the vastness of this universe, our God hears us….. he loves and cares for us…… I’m saying….. sometimes I get slightly discouraged by the things not going right in my life….. but in the history of all of the universe lol, does it really, truly matter? These “world-shattering” problems are silly……and  God is great, all the time.

You are part of something bigger than your life. Don’t forget that.

Can’t handle these songs

I can’t with these songs lol. These are just random old songs that I absolutely love so much I want to punch someone lol.

 

Roy Orbison. I love his voice so much it’s retarded lol. When this song comes on I don’t care who i’m talking to, they need to be quiet. I’m serious. How can you NOT want to roll your windows down and blast this at a red light?!?!

 

Let me tell you something, Marty. Felina was a FOOL. I just don’t understand how the entire world can’t get down to this……

 

Come on….. you know you’ve seen a face before.

 

I’m not talking bout moving in….. and I don’t want to change your life…… but there’s a warm wind blowin’ the stars around, and i’d really love to see you tonight. Isn’t that how it always starts? LOVE!

 

I can’t handle it! I just can’t deal!

 

Brian Wilson. Amazing. This song brings back sooooooo many childhood memories! Yes.

 

Linda. Freaking. Ronstadt. Need I say more?

 

At least he’s honest! LOL. Another fave=)

 

Frankie Valli all day, son!

 

A change. gone. come. Booyah. Sam Cooke, in general, is one of my favorite musicians.

 

 

I can’t LOL. I have to stop. Of course there’s thousands more lol. But I gets DOWN to these songs lol.